Edyn (The Essence Project Book 1) Page 19

  I must be crazy. 2 Timothy 1:7 doesn’t apply to me. It couldn’t possibly. What sane man sees the ghost of a girl that died almost twenty years ago?

  Please, don’t take her from me again, though.

  Even if it’s just in my dreams.

  I set the journal to the side and picked up the worn bible. Scanning the table of contents, I found the book of 2 Timothy near the end. It took me a moment to find it. The page was brightly colored like all the rest, with words scribbled all over. 2 Timothy 1:7 read: "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound-mind."

  My heart ached for him, and I felt immense guilt. I was the reason he thought he was crazy. He could never let me go, even after all that time. I was having a hard time wrapping my mind around that.

  I had never forgotten him either, and every time I thought about him, I would feel this cosmic pull, like I was supposed to find him. Every time, though, I would dismiss it. I had gone to the Department of Public Records twice looking for him, but both times ‘Ryker Evans" turned up nothing. I hadn’t known Samuel’s name at the time. Maybe I would’ve found a way to him that way, if I had only known.

  Maybe I could’ve found him before Samuel pushed him past his breaking point.

  Maybe I could’ve saved him.

  14

  J ophiel gave me one day to say goodbye. One day to get ahold of myself. On day two, it was down to business. He came shortly after my breakfast had been delivered, although like the day before, I refused to eat anything.

  "Come now," he said, exasperated. "What good will it do you to starve yourself? We need to get started. Today we’ll just be running some tests. Later, I expect you to eat something."

  Dirk and another soldier, who’s name I didn’t know, came into the room. The unnamed man handcuffed me again in the front, and they both flanked me down through the hallway behind Jophiel.

  The hallway was just as white as my room. White, white, white everywhere. We turned several times before we finally reached a set of double doors. Jophiel placed his hand on a scanner to the left of the doors, then swiped an access card after removing his hand. Another beep and click, and the doors swung open.

  I was ushered into a massive room. Again, white and metal everything surrounded me. To the left was a chair resembling a dentist chair, without any padding. It was just cold metal, under large lights typically found in operating rooms, with metal restraints for a person’s wrists, ankles, chest, and thighs. Clearly they didn’t want anyone going anywhere. A number of hospital monitors were sitting just behind it, and a rolling table was next to the chair, scattered with a variety of instruments. On the small table was a white cloth covered with blood.

  "I thought I told you to clean up everything." Jophiel said through gritted teeth, clearly on the verge of anger.

  In the short time I’d known him, he'd seemed to be a man that was almost always calm and collected. I could tell, though, that he wasn’t someone you wanted to anger.

  "Sorry, boss," said the unnamed man, before hurrying to remove the bloody cloth from my sight.

  Turning to me, Jophiel said, "So sorry, my dear. This," he said waving his arm around him in a sweeping gesture, "is one of the labs. This is where you’ll be spending a significant portion of your time."

  I let my gaze continue around the room. To the right was a huge window at least fifteen feet tall and twenty feet wide. Behind it the adjoining room was dark, but I could see dozens of glittering lights from different computers and machines. Directly across from us was an alcove with another row of computers.

  "Let’s begin," he said, placing his hand on the small of my back to guide me to the chair.

  I jerked at his touch as though he’d sent a jolt of electricity into me. He didn’t seem to notice. I didn't want his hands anywhere near me, and I fought back the urge to slap him.

  "Now, I’ll remove these handcuffs today if you promise not to try anything."

  Silently, I nodded at him, and he pulled a keyring from his belt. He found the key he was looking for, and clicked it into the lock on the handcuffs.

  "Now, if you please," he said. "Have a seat."

  I settled into the uncomfortable chair, waiting for them to secure the restraints around me.

  "The tests we’re going to do today are basic tests, so as long as you behave, there will be no need for the restraints." He moved behind me and out of my field of view.

  Dirk remained next to me, watching me with piqued interest. I could hear Jophiel fiddling with something for a moment, accompanied by beeps, humming, and the whirring of a machine.

  He returned to my side, pulling one of the machines with him. "First, we’re just going to do some different brain scans with this to get a good look at the inside of your head. We collect a lot of baseline information on our subjects before anything else so that we have an equal starting point." He began fixing sticky sensors attached to colorful wires all over my head. "We want to know what makes you tick."

  I closed my eyes, willing myself not to notice when his hands would brush my skin.

  "Just relax," he added, placing a hand reassuringly on my shoulder. "None of this will hurt today."

  Today.

  I shuddered.

  "I want you to try to focus on the positive of all of this," he continued. "If we can figure out if there’s perhaps a genetic link to your Essence, we may be able to develop some form of gene therapy for others so they can develop their own souls. It was never intended for souls to be bought and sold or stolen. We want to eliminate that altogether. So far we have been unsuccessful, though. I’m hoping you will be the key."

  "But why me?" I whispered. "Why not any of the others?"

  "When children are six months old, we evaluate them. We determine if they are Quintessent or Insentient. If they are in fact Quintessent, we monitor them as they grow, looking for any idiosyncrasies, special gifts, if you will. There’s always something. You, for example, heal very quickly. Have you ever noticed that?"

  I shook my head. "Not really." A lie.

  "Let’s take a look at that arm of yours, shall we?" He pointed at the bandage covering the spot where the bullet had grazed me. Slowly, he placed his hands on my arm, and I tensed.

  "Don’t touch me," I growled.

  "Relax, Edyn. I’m not going to hurt you." Removing the bandage carefully, I peered at the stitches. They were still there, but there was only a faint red line beneath them. "See, almost healed. Can you ever remember getting sick before?" he asked.

  I thought for a moment. There were a few times when my stomach hadn’t been overly thrilled by something I had eaten, but I couldn’t actually remember ever getting a cold or the flu or chicken pox or anything.

  Jophiel smiled. "We’ve been tracking your medical history since you were a child as we do with everyone, making note of your rapid healing capabilities and lack of sickness. It’s a fraction of a normal person's."

  "But why now? Why do you want me now?"

  "We’ve made some recent discoveries that have pointed us in the direction of studying how the body heals itself. We believe there may be something there that can help us create an Essence in a person. If the lack of an Essence is due to some sort of genetic damage, perhaps we can isolate something in your DNA that codes for your extraordinary healing abilities and use that to repair the damage in others."

  Something didn’t feel right about this. I couldn’t decipher what, but I obviously didn’t trust him. There was more he wasn’t telling me, and I had the feeling he wanted something other than to help people.

  "But enough chatter," he said. "Let’s see what the first scans show." He turned and started typing on the keyboard connected to the machine.

  A rainbow of wires ran from my head like tendrils, and linked me to the machine he was typing on. The screen came to life, and on the top half there were wavy lines pulsating across it. On the bottom, green letters, codes I guessed, were scanning quickly. Jophiel didn’t speak for a few mi
nutes as the machine continued its test.

  I wondered if I stood a chance if I tried to run.

  What if I grab the tray on that table and bash Dirk in the head with it?

  Maybe that would buy me enough time to get to the gun at his belt so that I could escape.

  "I wouldn’t if I were you," Jophiel said and my head snapped around to look at him.

  "What are you—"

  "Dirk doesn’t take kindly to getting hit in the head." He was smiling bemusedly.

  Dirk clenched a fist and took a step towards me.

  "Easy, Dirk," Jophiel said. "She’s not going to try anything, now are you? I’ll see what you’re thinking on this very screen before you can even try it."

  I wondered how long it took to transmit my thoughts to the machine, if there would be enough of a delay for me to act.

  "It’s only a few seconds," he said, answering my mental question again.

  "What kind of scanner can read thoughts? How is that possible?" I asked out loud.

  "Technology has come a long way, especially with government funding. This is essentially for government purposes only. I’m not surprised you haven't heard about it. I can see that you’re on edge though. Perhaps we should at least restrain your wrists, just in case. Dirk," he said and tilted his head.

  This time I acted the split second the thought entered my mind, and rolled off the table just as Dirk moved towards me. I reached for his belt as I hit the ground, and the wires ripped painfully away from my head. The machine crashed to the floor behind me, and Jophiel swore under his breath. Dirk kicked me once, twice in the ribs, and I let go of the gun that I was failing to free.

  "That’s enough, Dirk. If you would please put her back in the chair, we can get her restrained."

  I was coughing and still trying to catch my breath when he wrenched me upwards from the ground by my arm. Roughly, he threw me back into the chair and pinned me there. His breath was sour in my face while Jophiel carefully secured the restraints around my wrists.

  "That machine," he said, his teeth gritted together again, "cost forty thousand dollars, and you've just reduced it to junk. Dirk, strike her for me," he said casually as he straightened up.

  I didn’t have more than a second to prepare before Dirk backhanded me hard across the face. The taste of metal started filling my mouth, and I could tell my lip was split.

  "I’ve already told you once to behave. I would rather not have to teach you lessons, but I will have your cooperation one way or another."

  I spit blood into his face, my eyes burning with rage.

  "Again," he said as he pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped his face.

  My head snapped the other way as Dirk’s hand connected, and this time blackness threatened to creep into my vision.

  "Do let me know when you’re finished," he said with a touch of arrogance.

  I willed myself to flare up like I had before. Praying, I begged my body to produce the energy that had blasted everyone away from Ryker.

  Nothing came.

  "Now," he said, reaching for the metal table beside him. "Let’s go ahead and take some blood samples to get some of those tests started." He turned back around and had an alcohol swab in his hand. "We’ll take a fair amount today, but we’ll wait to take the rest in a week or two so your body can replenish some of it."

  When he started to clean the inside of my left elbow, I brought my legs back and kicked at him, catching him in the side. He staggered sideways into the tray on the table, sending metal instruments scattering across the floor with a groan. Dirk wasted no time grabbing my legs and leaning across them to secure my ankles to the chair.

  Jophiel got to his feet and straightened his blazer with a sharp tug. His gelled blonde hair had been mussed out of place, and he slicked it back with one hand. He quickly finished securing my ankles to the table, and I thrashed against the restraints when Dirk lifted himself off me.

  "I had really hoped you would make this easier," said Jophiel, venom filling his voice. "It doesn’t have to be this way." He nodded once at Dirk, and I knew what was coming.

  "If you thought I was going to make this easy for you, you were sadly mistaken."

  I closed my eyes, preparing for the blow. Instead, Dirk’s fist sank into my stomach and knocked the air out of me. I gasped as he punched me again and again.

  After a few more strikes I began to black out so Jophiel spoke up, "Thank you, Dirk."

  Sucking in air, I could just make out Jophiel’s fuzzy outline through my blurred vision as he leaned over me. "I have given you the opportunity to get through this with limited pain, yet you choose otherwise." Cool, controlled rage was flowing beneath the surface of him. "I do not need you to be a willing participant in this to get what I want, but thought perhaps I could at least offer you the courtesy of making this amicable for the both of us."

  I slammed my forehead into his face, and he cried out, bringing his hands to his nose. Blood was running through his fingers, and suddenly there was a crazed look in his eyes.

  "Fuck you," I spat in his face.

  He pulled his hands away, and in an instant one fist clenched my throat.

  My air was cut off and pinpricks of pain and light were filling my eyes.

  "I will take everything I need from you, Edyn, and there’s not a damn thing you can do to prevent that. It would be in your best interest for you to cooperate and make this easier on both of us. There is nothing in this world that I won’t do to get exactly what I want, no amount of pain I’m not willing to inflict." He squeezed more tightly, before releasing me on the verge of unconsciousness.

  I coughed and choked for air for a minute as he stood staring. There was a light burning in his eyes as he watched me struggle. In the midst of it all, I started laughing.

  My laughter extinguished the expression in his eyes, leaving him wearing a confused expression.

  "You…" I was still catching my breath through the laughter. "You can’t… You’ve already done… the worst thing… you could’ve done… to hurt me." On the verge of madness, I smiled at him like a maniac. "You took… Ryker from… me… There’s nothing more… you… can do… to hurt me…"

  He lifted two fingers towards Dirk without taking his eyes off of me, a mixture of shock and anticipation written all over his face.

  Dirk’s fist connected with my jaw, and my head snapped back. The second time, he sent me flying into the unknown chasm of unconsciousness.

  15

  I am dark but beautiful,

  O women of Jerusalem—

  dark as the tents of Kedar,

  dark as the curtains of Solomon’s tents.

  Don’t stare at me because I am dark—

  the sun has darkened my skin.

  My brothers were angry with me;

  they forced me to care for their vineyards,

  so I couldn’t care for myself—my own vineyard.

  Tell me, my love, where are you leading your flock today?

  Where will you rest your sheep at noon?

  For why should I wander like a prostitute

  among your friends and their flocks?

  If you don’t know, O most beautiful woman,

  follow the trail of my flock,

  and graze your young goats by the shepherds’ tents.

  You are as exciting, my darling,

  as a mare among Pharaoh’s stallions.

  How lovely are your cheeks;

  your earrings set them afire!

  How lovely is your neck,

  enhanced by a string of jewels.

  We will make for you earrings of gold

  and beads of silver.

  The king is lying on his couch,

  enchanted by the fragrance of my perfume.

  My lover is like a sachet of myrrh

  lying between my breasts.

  He is like a bouquet of sweet henna blossoms

  from the vineyards of En-gedi.

  How beautiful you are, my darling,<
br />
  how beautiful!

  Your eyes are like doves.

  You are so handsome, my love,

  pleasing beyond words!

  The soft grass is our bed;

  fragrant cedar branches are the beams of our house,

  and pleasant smelling firs are the rafters.

  I was lost in the words, forgetting that it was scripture. Ryker had wanted me to read it out loud to him, before he was killed, so I would read it now for him. It was beautiful poetry, so full of the love and adoration shared between two people. My heart ached for Ryker as I continued reading. This book of the bible felt so out of place from the rest of them. I wondered if he thought of me when he read it, even though he didn’t know I was still alive. The thought hit me, wouldn’t it be wonderful if I had that backwards, if I was reading it and thinking of him, and somewhere he was still alive.

  The first tears hit the tissue thin pages, and I slammed the book shut. The hole where my heart used to be was as raw as when the bullet had hit him. Jophiel had told me to move on, but how could I move on from someone like Ryker? How could I get over a love like that? We were just beginning, but we were supposed to have a lifetime together to make up for the twenty years we had missed.

  I had quite a bit of time all to myself here, so I spent much of it reading. It was much harder to read Ryker’s words than it was to read his bible. As much as I wanted to know more about him, each letter of his handwriting was like a needle digging into my flesh. Sometimes I couldn’t take it, and the pain was just too much.

  I had made it four days now in captivity. Allowing myself water was all I would do. I wouldn’t touch the food they had brought me, and I could tell that Jophiel was nearing the end of his patience with me on that.

  On the morning of the fifth day, nobody brought me breakfast. Instead, Dirk came to fetch me from my quarters. He fitted the handcuffs loosely on my wrists as I sat down on my bed.